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“Last night the United States dropped four 2,000 pound bombs on Saddam Hussein. I don't know anything about explosives, but, my God, do those things even need to explode?”
David Letterman quotes (American television Host and Comedian. He hosts "Late Night with David Letterman". b.1947)

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“The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves.”
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“Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystander .”
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“A lot of folks are still demanding more evidence before they actually consider Iraq a threat. For example, France wants more evidence. And you know I'm thinking, the last time France wanted more evidence they rolled right through Paris with the German flag.”
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“Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.”
David Letterman quotes (American television Host and Comedian. He hosts "Late Night with David Letterman". b.1947)
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“People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.”
David Letterman quotes (American television Host and Comedian. He hosts "Late Night with David Letterman". b.1947)
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“USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.”
David Letterman quotes (American television Host and Comedian. He hosts "Late Night with David Letterman". b.1947)
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