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“I would like to apologize for referring to George W. Bush as a deserter. What I meant to say is that George W. Bush is a deserter, an election thief, a drunk driver, a WMD liar, and a functional illiterate. And he poops his pants”
dmg Michael Moore quotes (American Film Director and Author, b.1954)
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“Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?”
Jenny0103 Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“According to this week's Time magazine, President George Bush is a serious fitness buff. He works out 60 to 90 minutes a day with weights. Apparently he likes working out because it 'clears his mind.' Sometimes it works a little too well.”
Jenny0103 Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because 'They've seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.' These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.”
Jenny0103 Bill Maher quotes (American Comedian, Actor, Writer and Producer. b.1956)
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“Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.”
Robin Williams quotes (American actor)
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“My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.”
Ellen DeGeneres quotes (American Actress and stand-up Comedian, b.1958 New Orleans, Louisiana, USA)
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“Americans have different ways of saying things. They say "elevator", we say "lift"... they say "President", we say "stupid psychopathic git.”
Alexai Sayle quotes
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“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
Robin Williams quotes (American actor)
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“Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.”
Rita Mae Brown quotes (American Writer, b.1944)
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“Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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